Last Updated on 6 years by Charbel Coorey

1. Me vs. Usain Bolt in a race. Or Hamilton Mazakadza vs. Lionel Messi, Cristiano Ronaldo and Kylian Mbappe.

2. Me and 10 friends on Twitter vs. Pakistan in an ODI match.

3. Royal Challengers Bangalore.

4. South Africa in Sri Lanka.

In case you’re wondering, that is a list of more competitive events than the recently completed (WOOHOO) Zimbabwe vs Pakistan ODI series.

The most competitive match of the series was the final ODI, and Pakistan won it by 131 runs. The whole cricketing world is happy this series is now over. Well, except Pakistan I guess, who were breaking all sorts of records, with some fans believing they are the greatest side ever. Fakhar Zaman is better than Viv Richards ever was. There is now no doubt that Joe Root replacing Babar Azam at no.2 in the ODI batting rankings was a complete joke. Bless.

If you want to be really positive, Zimbabwe actually won the series 3-2 in coin tosses. And Faf Du Plessis wants them removed from Tests. What next? ODIs? Depriving us of an amazing achievement in an otherwise forgettable series? What nonsense!

This series helped save time. I wrote the shortest ever cricket preview known-to-man after the 2nd ODI. I’m pretty proud of it. Another joined in!

My groundbreaking 3rd ODI Preview! How talented am I?!

Others getting in on the act, too!

No doubt, Pakistan did what they had to do. They were ruthless and professional, and we can’t bag them for it. Fakhar and Imam are superbly talented players, and represent a potentially very fruitful opening pair for Pakistan in ODIs. But, we can bag those supporters getting carried away, thinking Fakhar Zaman and Imam-ul-Haq are the two best things since sliced bread after hammering a Zimbabwe side missing eight key players. That too on flat pitches. Be realistic, please.

Nonetheless, congratulations to Fakhar Zaman who became the fastest ever to 1,000 ODI runs, reaching the mark in 18 innings. 515 came in this series, but he is a breath of fresh air for the nation. However, when watching the cricket on offer in Bulawayo, I was so keen to fly over, put my batting gear on and have some fun. I’m a right hander and lower order batsman, but could have scored runs batting left handed. It was a net session where records were on offer. Same was the case for the Pakistan bowlers.

For Zimbabwe Cricket, it’s now really time to get their act in order. I believe they should withdraw from international cricket, if possible, until they get their sh*t together. Ultimately, a series like this does no one any favours, except the statistics of the opposition, and the egos of some of their fans. And perhaps also, hopeful kids from around the world thinking international cricket could be this easy.

The performances were good by Pakistan, but please, stop getting carried away…

Let’s call him “Sir” Fakhar Zaman. Geez Dennis…

So, what were the bright spots for the hosts? Apart from winning the coin tosses 3-2, I hope we see more of Blessing Muzarabani. He looks a really good prospect. So too Ryan Murray, who showed some fight in his debut series. Otherwise, with players not getting paid and no World Cup for next year, it all looks extremely bleak for Zimbabwe.

For Pakistan, I say show us what you’re made of from here on in until the 2019 World Cup. Any of the top ten ODI sides in the world would have won this series with ease. Looking at their 5-0 loss in New Zealand earlier this year, Pakistan still have to prove to me they can consistently match it with the big boys, despite winning last year’s Champions Trophy.

So, there we have it. A series known only for records being broken and nothing else. One where I went to bed last night pretending it never happened. I’ll no doubt be keeping a close eye on Pakistan in the months leading to the World Cup, seeing whether all the hype over beating a weakened and battered Zimbabwe is worth it.

Thanks for reading!